Funny story. You know how just like two weeks ago I wrote how I would try and find time to do something fun at least once a week? Well, so much for that idea. I had the craziest week ever last week. It’s finally dawning on me that maybe I have too many classes and am working too much. I realized this when I found out I had four exams scheduled for this week. That’s right, four! You’d think the teacher’s do it on purpose just to torture me. This past week has been rough because I’ve been studying non-stop. I thought finals were over! I had a speech to give last Friday (my first one ever), a chemistry test Monday, and history test Tuesday, a biology test Wednesday, and I had a health test today. Finally I’m done! I am so proud of myself for getting through it because I never thought I could.
I knew the best way to approach my week was to take things one day at a time. While I didn’t spend as much time studying for each test as I would’ve liked to, I think I still did fine on them. I did get overwhelmed, though. Let’s just say that my emotions went a little crazy because of my anxiety. I thought to myself, How am I going to get all of my homework done and still manage to ace these tests? Notice that I said “ace.” This is my problem. You see, I like to get A’s on everything, not just as my final class grade but on every assignment, quiz, and test. The issue with this is that I continually set myself up for disappointment. My expectations for my academics are extremely high, which is great, but it causes me to beat myself up if I’m not perfect. This has been the hardest part about college. One of the biggest things I’m working on is learning to accept mistakes and be proud of myself. So while there were a few questions on those tests that I had to give my best guess on, I’m trying not to give them a second thought. The tests are over and there’s no way to change my results, so I shouldn’t dwell on it. I also have trouble remembering that these are the first exams of the semester, so it’s okay if I don’t do as well as I’d like to. There’s a lot of time for improvement.
Although it was a rough week, I was fortunate enough to receive blessings. Perhaps the main thing that’s kept me going was that last Thursday, my roommates saw how stressed I was, and so they decided to go to BJ’s and buy me dinner. They brought it back to the dorm, and we had a little picnic on the floor! I started crying because that meant so much to me. I also had a friend who treated me to Starbucks after I finished my speech because she was proud of me. I felt so spoiled. I love how people come to support you when times get tough. I feel like God was definitely behind all of that. Now, to celebrate the end of this week, the girls and I are headed to Riverpark to relax and do some shopping! Talk to you soon.