(Inter)National Pride

Καλημέρα, Sunbirds. This is your fellow carbon-based organism, Fabio Avetisyan, blogging live from Greece. I have never in my memory set foot outside California, and I have never really been big on travel, so this particular adventure is special as it is my first trip in which I can potentially get three different types of motion sickness within a couple of days. The first location we visited that really stands out to me was the Greece National Archeological Museum, one of the most famous museums in the world, located in the heart of Athens.

Upon entering the wondrous museum, the first exhibit we encountered was that of the illustrious Mask of Agamemnon. You know, the one with the epic nineteenth-century European mustache on it. As it is the death mask of the king who plundered Troy, this artifact is considered to be Greece’s very own national treasure. A fitting label for a mask depicting the man who sacrificed his own daughter and led countless Greek soldiers to their deaths to protect his own family name. What a hero.

The next item that caught my attention was a crumbling statuette of the Minotaur. It was in the same room as the giant bronze statue of Zeus/Poseidon throwing his weapon (lightning bolt or trident, respectively), which was itself quite the buff spectacle. The Minotaur was a monster created from the unholy union between a bull and a woman. King Aegeas was forced into giving it seven boys and seven girls to feed on. Upon seeing this creature, I proceeded to give it a piece of my mind by challenging it to a staring contest. Unfortunately, my efforts to shame the beast proved futile, though I’m sure Dr. Pam would have been victorious at such a competition.

I will be quite sad to leave Greece, as I will probably never set foot in this museum ever again. But not to worry. I’ve seen enough naked men to last a lifetime.

Fabio Avetisyan